The Excuses That Professional Organizers Hear

When I tell people that I am a Professional Organizer, their response is usually the same, "boy do I need you in my house!" and they laugh. So it got me thinking about what some of the things are that are stopping people from taking that next step and hiring me.

1. They are too embarrassed. Without a doubt when I walk into someone's house they always say that they are sure that theirs is the worst house that I have ever seen. Let me tell you a little secret, it isn't the worst. Even if it was the worst I wouldn't tell them. I am proud that they took the chance to invite me in their home. They should be feeling good, not bad. My tag line is "I enter with no judgment, I leave with no stories" period. I usually look at your home and decide on what we should attack first. Don't be embarrassed as they are asking for help. They should be proud!

2. Pressure from a family member. Well meaning family members tell potential clients that they should call me. Some will even buy gift certificates for my services. My tip is to only buy a gift certificate for a professional organizer if it is a requested gift. I have had clients who have hired me because a child or spouse tells them to. The client isn't ready for me. I often leave without charging for my time as I can tell that they are not ready to change. I want the client to want me there helping.

3. The scope of the project is too overwhelming. People are of the opinion that it will take me weeks to help them get organized. I will only book a three hour time slot at a time. Very rarely will I book for more than one of those slots before meeting and working with the client. When I work with a client we work side by side. I ask them questions that make them think. I ask them why they are holding onto a particular thing. When they start to answer me they begin to realize how silly some of their reasons are. They come to that conclusion all on their own. Pretty soon I stop asking the questions and they are able to process what to keep and what to toss all on their own. After three hours with me my clients tell me that my voice will forever be in their head asking them if they really need something.

4. The cost. Let's face it, cost is a factor for many. To help people with that I write my blog that is free to read and I also have my MS. Simplicity Facebook page where I give daily tips and advice. If you have a question, feel free to post it there or send me a private message. I have certain non-profits that I support that I donate my organizing gift certificates to their silent auctions. Often we just need an accountability partner. Just like having a personal trainer and having someone weigh you in weekly, just having support in some hard areas of life are necessary to make the change.

5. There is no time. Some people ask me if I can do the work while they are not there. The answer is nope, can't do it. You have to take those three hours off of work and work along side me while the kids are in school and you have no distractions. I consider taking time off of work to organize as a "mental health day". All employees should be given mental health days. Sometimes putting some well deserved attention on the issues at home can make for a more productive employee at work.

6. They don't know where to start. This kind of goes hand in hand with number three listed above about being too overwhelmed. For most people it is their kitchen area that is where the most help is needed. The kitchen is where we prepare meals and often process daily mail and paper. Having an organized kitchen can mean a family can sit down and enjoy a meal together instead of grabbing a plate to eat on the couch and zone out in front of the television.

Whatever your reason is, stop making excuses and start taking action. Your first step could be to simply find your own accountability partner to make it happen. It should be a friend who you trust and who you are not offended by when they tell you to get rid of stuff. A close family member is never a good idea. Maybe your first step is to work 10 minutes a day for 21 days to focus on organizing. If you can do it for 21 days you are well on your way to a more organized life! Get in the right mindset and start your journey now.

To Joyful, Simplified Living,

 

MS. Simplicity

 

MS. Simplicity, also known as Melissa Schmalenberger operates her business as I Did it with MS. Simplicity. She is a Professional Organizer based out of Fargo, ND and her website can be found at http://www.mssimplicity.com/

 

· Need to contact MS. Simplicity privately; you can email her at melissa@mssimplicity.com.

· For daily organizing tips find the MS. Simplicity Facebook business page here.

· Order featured Clever Container organizing supplies here, consultant ID #18.

 

How To Get The Male Gender To Organize

I received a question on my MS. Simplicity Facebook page asking for help on how to organize husbands and sons. As a married mother of three boys and being surrounded by them for the last twenty plus years I was surprised by this question. I was a messy teen girl, just ask my mom as she will tell you and she has the pictures to prove it. Frankly, you can even ask my college roommate and she will confirm my habit of having all of clothes mounded in a pile on my chair that she named "Melissa Mountain". Happily, all but one of my sons has the natural organizing gene. I think they inherited it from their father because when it comes down to it, I create the systems for our family and he is the one that maintains them. This works really well for our family. I do not necessarily think that being organized is a gender thing. When a client hires me I come into their home and create the unique organizing system for them and their family and it is up to them to maintain it after I leave. I usually take age and ability into account for each family. I never take into account gender. But what happens is the same rules and tricks apply for all genders and all ages. It is my opinion that we are all hardwired to be organized, some of us just little less than others.

What I have found is that some of us need to have the system created and then we can maintain it, like what I did for my family and for my clients. Not all of us have the resources to hire a professional organizer to come into our home to create the systems but there are things that you can do now to get your family moving in the right direction.

1. Create a simple reward system. I am not a fan of having a complicated chore chart with check marks and stickers that make more work for mom and dad. For our family we all had a habit of kicking off our shoes in the entry of our house. We would have a shoe pile that people would trip over and it drove me crazy. So one night I gathered the family and said if I find your shoes in the entry, you owe me a chore and if you find my shoes there, I owe you a trip for ice cream. This habit of our family kicking our shoes off in the entry was changed within a few days. The only one to slip is me and my husband will come upstairs carrying my shoes and tell me that I owe him two trips for ice cream!

2. Start with one area. Don't expect a person to change overnight and get all organized. We get overwhelmed when told "go clean your room". But what if you said every Wednesday I would like you to gather all of your dirty laundry and take it to the laundry room. Start the focus on clothing being washed, folded and put away.

3. Walk the walk. If you create rules, you need to make sure that you are a good reflection of them as well. For example if you say no eating or drinking outside of the kitchen but you take your can of diet coke and drink it in your bedroom, don't be surprised if you find your family doing the same thing.

4. Use math. I like giving my family and clients numbers to work with. Most people can comprehend a number. I had a client who was turning 12 and had a large stuffed animal collection that mom wanted smaller. I had the client choose her 12 favorite ones, based on her age, and we put the rest in storage. When she wanted one out that was in storage, she needed to swap one out so she always had the number 12 to work with. Or go and find me 5 toys in your room that you longer play with.

5. Set size limits. Give a basket and say whatever of your rock collection can fit in here you can keep. The child needs to then figure out what one is their favorites and get ready to part with the rest. Same could be said for a spouses old tee shirt collection, by identifying a drawer and telling them they can keep whatever can fit in the drawer. For me, it is my shoe collection. I have a limited space I am allowing myself to store my shoes. Once full, that is it.....well maybe my husband could have less shoes and I can use his space.

6. Set a timer. I use this tip all the time and if you ever had a child watch the Barney clean up song you know how well this works. I am so sorry if you know that song, as I am certain it will now be stuck in your head for the day. The point of the song was to clean while singing the song. When the song was over so was the cleaning. Nobody likes being told to go clean your room and don't come out until you are done. What happens is the whole day is spent in the room and you realize what cool stuff you have and zero cleaning happens. But if you spend just a few minutes at a time, it makes for an seemingly large task be much smaller.

7. Remove items. Most of the time organizing and cleaning a space is too overwhelming because there is simply too much stuff. Start to remove items you don't love or use. Make room for what you do love and it will be much easier to see your favorite books lined up on a bookcase and not piled up on the floor around the overstuffed bookcase.

8. Don't nag. Yes we know we need to clean our room, you don't need to tell us every minute. The chances are that we are not lazy, we simply don't know what to do with our stuff {this is the teen girl in me speaking here}. Go back to tip one start going through each of the tips and see if those work better than nagging. Teach your family how to organize and you won't have to nag, at least not as much.

So male or female, young or old we all want to be more organized, some of us just need more help and guidance. Make it fun and create systems that work for all members of your family. It sometimes takes some time to get it all working the way you want it. Remember, you can always call in reinforcements for help!

To Joyful, Simplified Living,

MS. Simplicity

 

MS. Simplicity, also known as Melissa Schmalenberger operates her business as I Did it with MS. Simplicity. She is a Professional Organizer based out of Fargo, ND and her website can be found at http://www.mssimplicity.com/

 

· Need to contact MS. Simplicity privately; you can email her at melissa@mssimplicity.com.

· For daily organizing tips find the MS. Simplicity Facebook business page here.

· Order featured Clever Container organizing supplies here, consultant ID #18.

Skills I Want My Boys To Have

Raising children is a slippery slope at times. We have to compete against friends and the media and our busy schedules to try to mold and grow children into productive members of society. I have one child that has left the nest and I am preparing for two more to leave in the next four years. What I am noticing is I am in a time warp of 18 years that goes by in a blink of an eye. I suddenly worry and wonder about what if I didn't teach them everything they need to know to survive. I don't want to be one of those moms who is paying for my 30 year olds cell phone bill. I wish I would have had a checklist when my boys were young to make sure that they had certain skills before they leave home. Lists are something that I can live by. A sense of accomplishment is felt when I can check that little box and say complete. But what if I was to create a checklist now, what would I want on it? Some things jump right to the front of my mind but may not be so obvious to others.

How to do laundry: This is a big one and it encompasses more than a FACS teacher can teach in a year. I want them to remember to always check pockets. Don't dry a woman's clothes....ever. How to fold and not live out of a basket of wrinkled clothes. These are the top items on my list.

How to clean vomit and other yucky things out of carpet: We have a dog that likes to leave surprises for us. A pet is a good training ground to learn how to clean carpet so that when they are a parent one day, they will not be squeamish about it. I personally am squeamish so I have raised boys who can do it!

How to plunge a toilet: It happens to the best of us and it is not going to magically fix itself. Better learn the art of the plunge sooner rather than later.

How to clean: Basics of weekly cleaning of bathrooms...and sometimes this needs to be done daily. Dusting and vacuuming as well as doing dishes are all skills that need to be perfected. Small things like how to load and unload the dishwasher, as well as the sooner you rinse and wash dishes, the easier it is.

How to cook and bake: You don't need to train them to be chefs, but basic skills are important. Knowing how to make 5 main course meals is a great place to start. Teach them how to make your family favorites and maybe you can turn over the meal planning and creating over to them. Knowing how to bake a cake from a mix is a basic skill that will impress the boyfriend/girlfriend in their life when the time comes.

How to eat unique and creative food: How many business meetings are there where the CEO will only eat mac and cheese. Exposing children to different foods is an important step. Nobody likes going out with that person who makes 4 changes to their order at a restaurant. Taking my kids out for sushi is a fun experience and now the youngest will even eat it.

How to write a thank you note: I am always surprised at graduation gifts I have given that do not come with a thank you note. That is our last hope as a parent to make sure that they have that skill down. Writing a sincere note is a gift that people appreciate. Also a good refresher of how to write on the envelope is good as well.

How to have a good work ethic: Believe me, this is a hot commodity right now. If you have a child that knows how to work hard they will be miles ahead of most of their peers. Especially if they work in the food industry as everyone should know the importance of good customer service and how tipping is an art. If you have kids who can't even take out the garbage without complaining you got a long way to go.

How to budget their money: Having kids have a debit card of their own and not a credit card is a good idea. They need to know that they have to earn more than they spend and that mom and dad are not there to always put money in their account for them.

How to organize: Having basic organizing skills is important. Simple things like if you take it out you need to put it back. Or don't buy something unless you already know where it is going to go. My favorite is the one in one out rule; if you buy a new pair of shoes, an old pair needs to go.

How to deal with mail: Knowing what to shred and what keep. What to receive electronically as well. Just having it sit in a pile is not the option. Just because we get it in the mail does not mean we need to keep it.

How to shake a hand: I want everyone, not just kids to learn how to really shake a hand. Don't give me the limp finger shake. Don't avert eye contact. Don't grab my hand and put it in a death grip either. Look me in the eye and shake my hand like you mean business.

How to hold a conversation: My youngest son does this when he and I go out to dinner together. I have him guide the conversation and it is amazing what he comes up with. When they start to date, they need to know how to look someone in the eye and talk to them without a screen in front of them.

As you look through this list, take the time to reflect where you are at on these items. Do you walk the walk or just talk the talk? What can you improve on? Because this I know for sure, even though you don't think you kids are watching, they are. I know that as my kids grew it was even more important for me to have a presence at home. Even though your teen may not want to spend time with you, you need to be present just in case they say something that is important in their lives.

To Joyful, Simplified Living,

 

MS. Simplicity

MS. Simplicity, also known as Melissa Schmalenberger operates her business as I Did it with MS. Simplicity. She is a Professional Organizer based out of Fargo, ND and her website can be found at http://www.mssimplicity.com/

· Need to contact MS. Simplicity privately; you can email her at melissa@mssimplicity.com.

· For daily organizing tips find the MS. Simplicity Facebook business page here.

· Order featured Clever Container organizing supplies here, consultant ID #18.

Flood Of Papers

The number one issue that I hear from clients is what to do with all that paper? They have stacks and stacks and sometimes boxes of it and they simply are paralyzed with fear and don't know what to do with it. So the paper pile just keeps growing and growing and growing. I think the blame can be placed on our changing technology. Technology has changed but our views of what to do with those papers as not. I still remember back to my parents storing every check they had ever written. Thirty years ago the only proof we paid something was in the cancelled check. So we held onto each and every check......for forever! I am trying to take my business paperless and with the purchase of a scanner this is making the job so much easier. They make all types of scanners. Some come with software that can even read your receipts for you. Others are small and portable in case you travel for business and need to take one with you. Well now we need to catch up to the changes in technology and you can start with these simple steps:

1. Look at what paper you get in the mail. How many of these things can you receive online? How many do you even need to get at all. Not confident that you can get the items online, simply take two minutes and call your bank and ask.

2. Get enrolled in online bill paying. In some instances you can stop even the monthly statement from being mailed to you. But you need to take the few minutes to figure out what can be done online. You need to make the call.

3. Not sure about keeping your bank statements. Call your bank and ask them what their policy is for obtaining copies if you need them. You may be surprised at the nominal fee for pulling your bank records for you. Isn't it worth a couple of bucks when you need the statements (that will come all neat and organized for you), rather than fishing through piles of papers trying to find them in a moment of panic?

4. What insurance papers should you keep? Once again, I will have my clients call their agents and ask them directly what they should keep. Do you need to keep the 50 page policy or is their one page that is important to keep?

5. Receipts: If you are self employed you will need to keep more than the average person, but do you need to keep all of them? Once again, call your tax preparer and see what they want you to keep. We now scan in all of my receipts that I use on my taxes as the IRS now considers scanned copies as good as the originals.

6. Business cards: Create a system that you input your contacts into your phone or contact book within 24 hours of receiving a business card. Figure out now if you even need them at all.

7. Kids papers: Keep the ones that bring a tear to your eye and get rid of the rest. Keep the ones that are special and make you proud or happy. Keeping everything is a recipe for disaster and creates paper clutter for years to come.

8. Recipes: We all have good intentions of making a new meal or dessert. But in reality we make the same 20 recipes over and over again. Be realistic what recipe clippings you are going to use. Set a goal of using it within a month or recycle it.

9. Take a photo: For many important items like passwords and usernames information I will take a photo of the set of numbers or enter into my smart phone with one of the many apps out there for remembering your passwords. Remember to make sure that the photos on your phone are stored in the cloud.

10. Retirement accounts and investment reports: Once again I tell people to call their investor or agent who helps them with these accounts. Ask your expert how long you need to keep them and if there is an option to receiving them online.

11. Catalogs: Once you order one small item from a company you seem to get their catalogs every week. Take a few minutes and call the company and ask to be taken off of their list. You can usually find their number on the back of the catalog or look for it online.

12. Phone books: Once again, look online for the service to stop getting each different one you get dropped on your steps. There seem to be about 4 that come out on a regular basis. If you do not use a phone book, then there is no need to keep receiving them.

13. Sentimental items: We all receive that card or letter that makes us happy. Create a happy file where you place those items. Then on a day where you need a pick me up, all the happy stuff is in one place for you to look.

14. Magazines: Do you get more than 2 magazines per month? If you do, that is more than you probably have time to read. Stop your subscriptions and if you do want to keep them see if there is an option to read your favorite magazine online on an e-reader.

15. Important Documents: Social Security cards, birth certificates, titles, deeds and appraisals all need to be kept in a safe place. Either have a safety deposit box or have a fire proof/water proof safe where these items are kept. They are not safe mixed in with all of your papers or shoved in a drawer.

When are you going to stop the influx of paper coming into your life? It is up to you to start to make the calls or look online. Challenge yourself to take one item at a time on this list for two weeks. In that time you should be able to reduce the amount of paper that comes into your house by at least half. Who knows, you may even save a couple of trees in the process.

To Joyful, Simplified Living,

MS. Simplicity

 

MS. Simplicity, also known as Melissa Schmalenberger operates her business as I Did it with MS. Simplicity. She is a Professional Organizer based out of Fargo, ND and her website can be found at http://www.mssimplicity.com/

· Need to contact MS. Simplicity privately; you can email her at melissa@mssimplicity.com.

· For daily organizing tips find the MS. Simplicity Facebook business page here.

· Order featured Clever Container organizing supplies here, consultant ID #18.

Graduation Party Ideas

So I am almost a year away from having had my first child's graduation party, a party that I had planned for a couple of years. You see, I have been going to graduation parties that my friends are having for their kids and I am seeing what I love and seeing what short cuts would work to make my event that much more simpler. His scrap book for elementary school has been done for two years. I knew who I am hiring to make a video…..my husband. I knew who I was hiring to cater the meal.

The best decision I made was to relieve myself of the stress of not having the party in my garage. Yes the garage.....as that is where I thought we would hold the party. It is a place where my organizing skills will shine. The garage is the last part of our home that needs to be organized. I have left it up until now as we have been busy with home and yard projects. I am sure people drive by my open garage and say to themselves, I can't believe she is an organizer, look at that mess. Well guess what folks....I am a real person with three kids and a dog....oh and a husband. I love to keep it real as it shows that I am human. I have been dreaming of my garage being organized for the last 5 years and I cannot wait for the transformation to begin. I am still waiting for my super organized garage so in order to save my marriage I went to plan B….hold the party somewhere else.

I have been seeing trends from the traditional party in the garage to holding parties elsewhere such as parks, restaurants, churches, community centers, theaters, etc. Another great idea I have seen is several families having their parties together. Chances are your child has a close group of friends that you could all work together and share in the party expenses.

 
Tips for planning a graduation party:

• Keep it simple. Keep it simple. Keep it simple. I want to know why we don’t have these big parties for our children when they become employed full time and have health insurance. That is the time that parents should celebrate! My party may look like it was really expensive and took a lot of planning and time. But compared to what I was seeing out there, mine was on the conservative side of things.
• Focus on what you enjoy. For example if you hate to cook, enlist some friends and family to help or if the budget allows, hire a caterer.
• If you are stressed about your house not being “picture perfect” focus on these areas; the kitchen, entry way, guest bathroom and whatever room the party is going to be held. Now is not a time to clean out your closets and organize your medicine cabinet. If you are having the party in the garage sweep the garage and hang up sheets to hide the messy areas.
• Keep the beverages simple, bottled water and maybe 2 soda choices, one diet and one caffeine free.
• Don’t have your party be weather dependent, have a backup plan!
• Ask for friends to serve as hosts at the party for you. Put a friend in charge of food, one in charge of drinks and one in charge of garbage. You need to enjoy the party too!
• I have seen a lot of graduation open house invitations on Facebook this year, what a great and easy way to send out the invites to friends. Most family still want a paper invitation.

Memorabilia Tips:
• The pressure is always on to have the perfect combination of photos of the kids at the graduation parties, but to not make it look like a shrine to the child....we have to keep those egos in check!  Have a framed and matted 8 x 10 of the graduate and have a pen available for the guests to sign the mat. This is a great keepsake for the graduate. I have seen these in Target in the frame aisle (they usually have a wedding couple in the picture). I used the Dr. Seuss book "Oh The Places You Will Go" as my guestbook. It is a keepsake and something practical as it is a book my son can read to his children someday. {We used the Dr. Seuss theme as a saying on a chalkboard that was on his display table, see photo at the top of article}
• Poster board with fun pictures of the graduate through their life are fun to look at. Once again, keep it simple and find a friend who loves to scrap book, they could finish this project for you in a couple of hours. Tip, scan the pictures into a computer or make copies before cropping as some of the photos may be one of a kind. I like the photo boards that have a theme to them. Try to group them together into areas like their interests in school. Group the sports ones.....special friends......if they are in drama or music.....you get the idea. Instead of poster boards, I did albums by theme that took my husband and I about 4 hours to create. We found our favorite pictures and had them blown up into 8 x8 and placed in an album, one picture per page and our album could not have pages added. We had limits and we had to pick our favorites. This also is something that my son can keep forever as opposed to a poster board that is hard to display.
• Take all of the grade school pictures and display them in chronological order. It is fun to see the progression of the graduate. I am sure you have a family member that has been collecting these for years for you all jammed into one frame! I created one board with all of his photos from school on. It was a super cute way to see the progression through the years. {See photo above}
• A graduation party I attended two years ago had a book that was assembled on line by the dad with the child’s quotes and pictures throughout his life. You do not need to tell the life story, just a few humorous stories here and there. For example, maybe they had a favorite shirt that they wore all through 3rd grade, or maybe the graduate hated math in elementary school and now they want to be a math teacher. Make it personal.
Food Tips:

1.     People are not looking to be fed a meal. Many have already been to several graduation parties during the day already. The only ones that are looking at being fed are your out of town family and guests. The majority of the guests are just there to stop in and say hi, drop off a card and leave.

2.     Don't serve alcohol. It is just asking for trouble. First, alcohol gets expensive and can add hundreds of dollars to an already stretched budget. Second, alcohol could get into the hands of minors or the relative that really should not have anything to drink because they get even more loud and more obnoxious.

3.     Have plenty of bottled water. If it is hot out, people will need the water to stay hydrated. My green tip is to have recycling bins placed so that it encourages people to recycle the plastic water bottles.

Trendy graduation food:

• Anything that is a finger food and easy to eat.
• Most people come already full to a graduation party. Why not serve just desserts or have a make your own ice cream sundae bar?
• Cotton candy machine rental? Yes, it can be done. But please remember it is a sticky mess and if you are the one making the cotton candy, you will be covered in that sugary floss for the day.
• Pick a theme with the food, such as Mexican and stick with it. For example, have a salsa bar with different kind of chips and salsa. And a walking taco is always a good choice. What is the graduate’s favorite type of food? Maybe Italian, then you could have a pasta bar with garlic bread and different pastas and sauces for a heavy meal if you have a lot of those out of town guests coming. We did brunch, super easy and most people didn't schedule graduation parties in the mornings. So we had crème brule French toast and mini fruit pizzas.
• Anything on a stick is always fun to eat. Think fruit kabobs with dip.
• Cupcakes instead of cake. Cupcakes are easier to eat, no cutting required and no utensils. Have the cupcakes in different flavors…what is the graduate’s favorite cake flavor? Instead of a traditional cake, we had cake bites, bits of cake covered in frosting!

Favors:

• I like the idea of candy in the school colors as centerpieces. M and M’s come in so many colors, place the school color M and M’s in candy dishes, or simply scatter them down the table on a white tablecloth. Take it to the extreme and order M and M's with the graduates face on it. Nothing says we love you like candy with your face on it!
• I was at one graduation party last year that had a "candy buffet". A table full of every kind of candy imaginable. My 12 year old loved it as he picked up enough bubblegum to get him through the summer!
• I found templates for Hershey kisses and mini candy bar covers that I customized with his school colors and his name. It was cheap and easy to do while I watched a movie one night. {See picture above}
• The best option, keep it simple and skip this part all together.

Please keep in mind, don't stress and have fun! I have another child that is graduating next spring.....maybe I will get my garage organized by then. Or most likely I will throw the same party as it worked so well the first time, why try to reinvent the wheel!

To Joyful, Simplified Living,

MS. Simplicity

 

MS. Simplicity, also known as Melissa Schmalenberger operates her business as I Did it with MS. Simplicity. She is a Professional Organizer based out of Fargo, ND and her website can be found at http://www.mssimplicity.com/

 

· Need to contact MS. Simplicity privately; you can email her at melissa@mssimplicity.com.

· For daily organizing tips find the MS. Simplicity Facebook business page here.

· Order featured Clever Container organizing supplies here, consultant ID #18.

 

What To Do With Your Messy Child

So what do you do if your child is messy and you fear their future as a star on the show "Hoarders"? First be realistic. Is it really that bad or are you just imagining it? Second, start being proactive in a loving way. When your children are young, that is the time to start working on them and creating the skills necessary to learn what is special and should be kept and what is ok to take a picture of and let go. Let's be honest, we can't keep every piece of paper that little Johnny colors on and brings home from Pre-K. There is going to be years of paper coming in. Figure out now what to keep and what is ok to go in the recycling bin. Remember my test of "does it bring a tear to your eye?" If it does, then keep it. If it does not, then toss it.

Not only do they have papers that are brought home but they also have their possessions that are stored in their room and sometimes all over the house. So often when I work with client's they are terrified to throw* anything of their child's away. I am not sure where this fear comes from, but parents everywhere, I give you permission to start to throw your kid's stuff away. I am talking about gum wrappers, broken bracelets, one earring without a mate. torn books, pieces of half scribbled on paper and toys they no longer play with. I am not telling you to get rid of their prized possessions, simply the junk and clutter in their room that surround them. Work with your children to figure out what they value most, and listen to them.....really listen.

This is my concern, if you don't teach children now while you are living with them what is of value and what is not of value when will they learn it? Will you be visiting their first apartment and have to move the pile of clothes that they don't wear off of the couch before you can sit down. Will you go into a bathroom filled with beauty products where only a handful are used?

Interesting enough when I have the children working with me, guess who is okay with getting rid of the stuff? It is true, it is the child. What I often hear is a mom saying, "but that this the stuffed animal that uncle Alan got you on your first birthday?" I hear the parent trying to talk the child into keeping the object. Who has the problem with clutter I wonder....the pack rat kids or the sentimental parent?

This lesson became laser focused on me when my husband and I were watching a youtube video from one of my boys' favorite videos when they were young. My husband and I were laughing and saying how we couldn't believe how much our boys loved that video. Both of our older boys looked at us and said they didn't remember it at all. Then it dawned on me.....it was my memory of the video and the good times we had while watching it....it was not their memory.

So ask yourself when helping your children declutter, whose memory is it anyway? Learn how to give with purpose and show your children that when they drop off a load of clothes and toys to a battered women's shelter it is going to have a direct impact on a child. Chances are your kids will step up and do the right thing....will you?

And as a reminder, tell those well meaning grandparents to start to give the gift of experiences, and not stuff. Pay for the dance lessons that Susie has been dreaming of taking. Or the drum lessons that Molly has wanted. Chances are the gift of experience will stay with them much longer than a gift of clothing will.

*I use the term throw loosely here. Please know that I encourage recyling in every form and I encourage my clients to do so as well.

 

To Joyful, Simplified Living,

 

MS. Simplicity

MS. Simplicity, also known as Melissa Schmalenberger operates her business as I Did it with MS. Simplicity. She is a Professional Organizer based out of Fargo, ND and her website can be found at http://www.mssimplicity.com/

 

· Need to contact MS. Simplicity privately; you can email her at melissa@mssimplicity.com.

· For daily organizing tips find the MS. Simplicity Facebook business page here.

· Order featured Clever Container organizing supplies here, consultant ID #18.

The Voice In Your Head

 

We finished our Spring Fling Challenge this week and it was a great success. For 21 days I gave tips on my MS. Simplicity Facebook page for little challenges. Many items were flung and many homes were organized along the way. Sometimes we need that little voice in our head telling you to just get rid of something if you aren't using it. As soon as you release yourself of the items and the clutter you start to feel lighter, just in time for spring {I promise it is coming}. So what are you waiting for?
You have to do the hard work of organizing and clearing the clutter yourself. Even when clients hire me, they have to be there. I can't do it for them. But I do ask some important questions to help them figure out why they are holding onto items. I have been called the Mentalist, as I get in my clients' heads. Long after I am gone, they still hear my voice in their head. I truly hope it is a good thing! Often my voice needs to take over the other voice in their head, the one that is telling them...you paid good money for that......you may need that some day....you don't love me if you get rid of it. We all have that voice, for some it is louder than others.

My hope is that some new questions start to go through your head. Here are some of the questions that get stuck in my clients' heads:

1. When was the last time you used it? If your answer was more than 6 months ago you need to let it go. Clearly you are not using it and loving it otherwise you would use the item more often. If my clients are not ready to part with the item, I simply ask them when will they use it by. I then put that date on a post-it note and put it on the item. Once the date passes and they have not used it, time to fling it.

2. Do you love it? You really should surround yourself with things and people for that matter that you love. I had a sweater that my boyfriend bought me in college. He had no money at the time, and it meant a lot to me that he used his hard earned money for it. All this sweater did was collect dust. It was wool and I found out I am not a fan of wool. I wore it a total of 4 times. I finally decided to get rid of it as the boyfriend/now husband could care less about it. I was the one who had the issue with holding onto it, not him. What a sense of freedom to get that sweater out of my closet that I didn't love.

3. Does it make you happy? Let's face it, we all have things in our home that make us sad when we look at them. Think about those skinny jeans in the closet. We all have a pair. But every time we pass them in the closet instead of inspiring us to exercise more and eat less it does the opposite, and as for me, I just want to eat a cookie. Having been someone who has lost some weight and can now fit into those skinny jeans, I don't want them.....I bought new clothes. So if you have items in your house that are not making you happy, get rid of them {people that don't make you happy are a whole different area and we need a different expert for that!}.

4. Do you have duplicates? I had a client that had 7 staplers on her desk {see picture above}. This is a common occurrence, I see it in closets with 15 pairs of black pants. If we don't have our items organized we tend to buy duplicates. We know it is there somewhere, we just aren't sure where....so we buy another. Pretty soon we have 7 staplers! So what do you do? Keep the one that you love and turn to again and again and fling the rest.

So when you are taking an organizing project on, start asking yourself these questions. After asking them for several weeks, they will become a habit and become your path to a more organized home and life.

To Joyful, Simplified Living,

 

MS. Simplicity

MS. Simplicity, also known as Melissa Schmalenberger operates her business as I Did it with MS. Simplicity. She is a Professional Organizer based out of Fargo, ND and her website can be found at http://www.mssimplicity.com/

 

· Need to contact MS. Simplicity privately; you can email her at melissa@mssimplicity.com.

· For daily organizing tips find the MS. Simplicity Facebook business page here.

· Order featured Clever Container organizing supplies here, consultant ID #18.